Permission Denied

In recent days I have acquired a couple of students. It all started when the teacher that teaches next door needed a place for three students to makeup a quiz. She had been doing this all day and so by the last hour of the day I knew the routine...the quiz takes about 15-20 mins to complete. Three young gentlemen enter my classroom; one was a former student of mine, so we placed him near my desk, to reminisce the good old days. The second young gentleman is best buds with a couple of my former students who come back to visit me to show me videos of giraffes licking zoo walls, shellacked alligator heads who have swallowed their own teeth, and new/interesting facts about llamas and alpacas...he has started tagging along (I actually really don't know this guy). Then...the third young gentleman...hmmmm...interesting fellow...he sat in the back of room and (along with the other two) appeared more involved in the lecture than in the quiz they were supposed to be taking. In fact every question I asked, they would all raise their hands and actually wait (as if I would ever) for me to call on them! My former student relived an event that was all too nostalgic for him...the comment, "Put your hand down" but with motions and the occasional sound effect. His response, "Huh just like old times Mrs. Kunz." "Yeah, now FOCUS, you are not here to be entertained or reminisce, but to FOCUS on the task at hand...and that goes for you two in the back as well!" After 30 mins of this, I was starting to get a bit annoyed, "Gentlemen, I have been doing this all day, and either A) you are afraid to go back to your own class, B) you have no idea what are doing on this quiz, in which case you need to learn the art of "know what you know and know what you don't know" or C) you are TRYING to annoy me, in which case it is SAFER for you to exit NOW, it would be a much less traumatic experience to deal with Mrs. Baker than it would be with ME! My former student and Boy #2 left immediately...Boy #3 however, "still need[s] to finish question #4." I gave him a deadline to make his way out. The deadline came, I told him to "LEAVE!!" He paused on his way out, hung his head, scanned the room, locked eyes with me, and said "It's awkward… you know… saying goodbye." "Hmmm, I didn't see it that way, in fact I am over it already, GOODBYE!" It took him about 3 more tries to leave and then he and Boys 1 and 2 were back after school to get me to give them the Sammy Sosa salute. Apparently that day was the beginning of, what THEY thought was, a beautiful relationship. Since than everyday I now find myself with Boys 1, 2, and 3 in my classroom trying to carry on conversations (via Boy #3) like, "Mrs. Kunz, a word that rhymes with 'syncronize' 5...4...3...2...1... trinkronize would have been one, or sminkronize would have been another good one." "I hate gym class, I always get picked last...yeah, I'm not good at athletics." "Mrs. Kunz a word that rhymes with 'viper' 5...4...3...2...1... miper would have been one, or zyper would have been another good one." WHAT HAVE MY SWEET MOMENTS AFTER 3:00 pm COME TOO?!? I have had to start guarding my door, which has only resulted in questions like "Permission to enter?" followed by "Permission denied." Or then there is the famous "Permission to speak?" followed by "Permission denied." We have run into situations where ACTUAL students of mine, coming for extra help after school are scared because all they here outside the annex is me locking my door and repeatedly saying "Permission denied" and Boy 3 repeatedly saying "Just do the Sammy Sosa thing and I will leave...just do the Sammy Sosa thing and I will leave." Boy 3 and I had to have a little chat yesterday, which resulted in him entering my classroom before 11th hour, "permission denied...permission denied." "I come in peace and bearing gifts, peace pipe and all, I would like to present you with these coupons (straight from Sunday's newspaper) for Wendy's fresh brewed coffee. I know that I have crossed a line. Please find it in you to forgive me." I had myself a good laugh...until after school today..."Mrs. Kunz a word that rhymes with "government" 5...4...3...2...1... smotherment would have been one, boverment would have been another good one."